Checking In

It's been a really long time since I've posted anything.. Been busy with studying and feeling stressed. And got to apologize to hazelnut cause i didnt even know she was leaving to germany again until she texted me on the way to the airport. :'(



btw.. yeah thats the form IMU gave to me today.. Even before taking the USMLE step 1 or confirming that I'm going to TJU, i have to fill in accomodation forms and be on the waiting list. I really got to buck up and study and make sure i do well for both my end of semester exams and my step 1. :/ ( in short = study hard, do well in exams, be doctor) HAHA

Seth

Things I Like #6:

HowStuffWorks (howstuffworks.com)

During my Facebook fast the past few days I discovered this site, and I've been spending more time on it than even Facebook =.= but this site is awesome!! So many interesting topics divided into categories like adventure, culture, entertainment, science, tech...

The last article I read was "10 Scientific Laws and Theories You Really Should Know".

The list includes the Big Bang, law of gravitation, Newton's laws of motion, Archimedes' buoyancy thing, (yay, two out of ten we learned in school! haha) but what really caught my eye was Kepler's laws of planetary motion - super interesting, plus I finally know who Kepler was cos a friend used to attend a school named after him - and Einstein's general relativity! The idea that space and time can be manipulated by gravity is just... whoosh.

Again, really good articles and videos and quizzes here. Highly rated and recommended ;)

Things I Like #5:

Neutral colours. See:

No matter what the picture is of, the colours make it look pretty! Kind of like one art project in school where we had to paint a picture with different shades of just one colour. I'm sure if we were pro enough the picture would've turned out super nice just like these ones here but sadly we're not. When I was done, mine looked like a muddy blue puddle...

A little low on highs

Hola, it's september! One more month and I'll be back in Freiburg. So much more work to do but so little time... As usual I regret now that I didn't start working earlier - now it's gonna be like back to spm days, full-speed chugging ahead! Maybe coffee will become my best friend from today onwards.

Here's a pretty picture of Freiburg to liven up things a bit!

I must say that being back in Malaysia hasn't turned out to be what I expected. My family is fine, they've all been manja-ing me since I came back - dad always asking me to go out and eat, mom taking me shopping and unexpectedly paying for EVERYTHING I buy (they used to call me Pacman cos I "swallow" money and always worried that I would become broke one day) and my brother is so different now! He talks to me and everything. Once his friends came over and he introduced me and let me play his card games with them! And at home we kacau each other so endlessly my parents get annoyed and say stuff like "you think you're still 5 years old ah". But awwwww, I can feel the siblingy love growing already. Hahahahaha.

Hmm, I just realized our "haha"s have grown a little longer since we started typing them. Like in form 1, "haha" was funny and "hahaha" was really funny. Now? "Hahaha" is kind of a friendly filler laugh and the really funny stuff get rewarded with "hahahahahahahaha" or "HAHAHA". Why ah?

Anyway.

In the friends department though I find myself sadly lacking. When I just came back and wanted to meet up with some people, they said, stay at home first or else your parents won't be happy. So I stayed at home. And stayed at home some more. After a while it was like I never came back and my family started commenting on how I've been abandoned by my friends. Lol. I don't blame them though. It's no one's fault. I guess we just grew apart and the lack of common ground just makes for sparse conversation. When I finally did see some friends, there was an awkwardness that wasn't there before. Maybe it was due to my ridiculously unawesome conversational skills. I'm so sorry about that. I'm really more of a listener who just adds a few grunts and nods here and there. (Oh gosh so manly!) If anything more is expected of me I start feeling stressed =.= 

But! I really appreciate the kind souls who still drop some words once in a while. I always look forward to the few hours spent around a tiny table, drinks in hand, light conversation floating around... Only I don't ask you guys out cos I'm the only one on break and not being able to drive adds to the suckiness cos asking people out and THEN asking them to come fetch you is really just plain lousy.

I hope some of you see this and take it as a kind of explanation and don't think I'm unfriendly T_T because again, talking is not my strong point and talking about feelings is even harder. Writing makes things that much easier.

Oh! Just one last thing before I go study. Here's a postcard my students sent from Germany:

The two sisters are my students. Why they so cuuuuuute T_T
They sent this while on holiday at the Nordsee near Hamburg. I really like this family la! I'm so lucky to have found them cos they're my first students and I just saw an ad they put on the Studentenwerk Freiburg website that arranges accomodation and work opportunities etc. and I wrote to them and voila! now I know one of the sweetest families ever. They really trust me to do my job and have been asking when their youngest son can start even though he's only two and a half. :)))

I feel all warm inside. Hahahahaha!
Okay, off to work now.

Things I dislike #4

Ok.. I really hate it when a friend give you wrong directions... AND THINK NOTHING OF IT.

The other day my friend said we should go out. So me being a good friend, although i was already tired so alright.. lets.. He mentioned lets go venue A! and i happily drove there.. went through an hour jam.. and he called me saying he will be late cause he's with another friend now and that he wants to go some other place. I u-turned and waited half an hour plus for him to text me the new address of where he wants to go. =.=

When i gotten the address, it was a message in which there was no name, just a house number and street. I, being a good friend or an idiot, did my best to google the place and drove there. Upon arrival, (after another hour of jam), got a call from him, in which he passed the phone to the owner of the restaurant. Apparently it was the wrong address and it was opposite the town. I was driving in the wrong direction the whole time.

I didnt want to argue and just told i would go home and rest cause deep down im exhausted. It happened a few times and it seems like he's a friend who wants to do something and as long as he could do it, he's happy, whether im there or not, it doesnt matter.

Living in Laos for a week.

Hey! It's been a really loooooong time since i posted anything here.. Went for a trip to Laos for community work and then been busy with community medicine project and research work back in uni.

Well a little about my Laos trip! We called it the Laos Humanitarian Expedition, which is way too cool a name for what we did exactly.. :P We went over and helped paint the school children's library, bought materials for the village we were in (Muang Kham village) to build a community toilet and then i think they also used some of the funds we brought to rent a tractor and flatten the roads, trust me.. the roads there.. OMGosh. They really needed flattening.

Here we were climbing down the jetty with some medicine we brought for the village.

We had to take a boat to cross the river to the village, and this is after we took a 10 hour bus ride. @.@

First day in the village, we walked to their paddy fields and tried planting paddy. Really have to appreciate rice after this..

Ordered insects to eat when we were at the town, it was surprisingly tasty! and most of us ate it. Didnt expected so many of us to be so brave. haha

During our stay in the town, we ran around town with these half motorcycles, half vans? They call them tuktuk (its similar to rides in Cambodia and the countries in that region)

The 2nd home that opened up for us. This is the house i stayed in during the time we spent in Muang Kham 

Me and Ter! One of the boys who were really helpful!

Overall it was a really great trip, we went over and the villagers were very welcoming. Feeding us rice like crazy, fearing we would actually be able to lose weight there.. I really enjoyed playing with the kids, we didnt understand each other because I couldnt speak Lao, but we still managed to get along, tickling each other and them trying to climb on me. 

During our farewell, I'm not a crying type of person, but watching them cry when we leave, it really touched me. Even with such a short stay, they had grown attached to us and us to them. 

We might have or have not changed much for them but just by going there and showing that there are people who helps each other, I think thats the most important thing? Sometimes when we read about all the terrible things in this world, we need to know there are people who would care.

Hello blog,

... long time no see!

I just wanted to write about a small adventure I had with chilies yesterday.

See, I have three small students. Two sisters and their neighbour. Ella is 7, Frieda is 5 and the neighbour's daughter, Nola, is 5 too. So one day out of the blue Ella and Frieda's mom asked me, "Hazel, can you cook?" Me: Mumble mumble mumble... Mom: " Can you cook well?" Then she asked me to cook Malaysian food for all of them after the last lesson of the summer. I bravely agreed, then went home to panic and ask everyone for ideas.

One night, holy intervention! I dreamt about steamboat. When I woke I considered it, I thought it was a good idea, right? Just buy all the ingredients and I won't even have to cook! So last Saturday, I told them about it. There tragedy struck. The neighbours already knew about this "Chinese fondue"! Apparently they cook it sometimes during winter cos it keeps them warm. To me it was like a stab in the face.

So yesterday. I got a recipe off the internet and went to the kitchen to try cooking sambal for nasi lemak. One of the ingredients called for was 10 deseeded red chilies. I got to work. I had fun deseeding those chilies one by one: "Wah, look how many seeds there are! Lucky they're all being thrown away, otherwise the sambal would be really spicy..." When I was done I had a small handful of chili seeds and stood there admiring it for a while. Then I went on cooking. About 10 minutes later I noticed an old cut on my finger started hurting again. Half an hour later, the pain spread to all my fingers. An hour later, my hands were on fire!!! I had to keep washing them in ice-cold water to numb the pain. And I couldn't even feel the cold on my hands anymore. When I had to leave the kitchen I brought a pot of cold water with me. In two hours my hands were red and swollen. It became so unbearable I went online to search for remedies... I tried vegetable oil, vinegar, even milk, which worked the best cos it was like instant relief as long as I kept my hands soaking in it. The worst was the vinegar, which only added to the pain.

I watched movies till about 4 in the morning to distract myself, plus I remembered my friend's tips from her baby delivery class that breathing is the key to managing pain so I sat there and concentrated on my breathing like a pregnant woman. Around then I decided I should go to sleep even if it still hurt. Woke up today and flexed my fingers, phew, it doesn't hurt anymore!!! I only still have sensitive skin and really dry skin from being washed so much but that's really a small thing.

So yup, small torture story lor.

***

Update 04.08:
Lunch with the students' families went well!!! The food was goooood, though the kids didn't like it and left their plates half full, their parents loved it. I did too :D

People hate my face.

It's been described as blur, angry, unfriendly, skeptical... The most positive description I ever got was that I have an "intense stare".

Why?!?!?!

Of course those comments only ever came from people who don't really know me that well, but still, is my default face expression that bad?!

As if I walked around looking like this all the time.

(Can't Think Of A Creative Title), Things I Like #4

I never noticed how icky it can be to cycle in the rain. Today I cycled from home to the cathedral to meet a friend and then we cycled to a mutual friend's house together. (Just checked on Google Maps, it's a full 10km!! Dear body fat, please cry now.) So it was raining la. When I left I looked and felt like this:

Upon arrival:

I have no idea how she managed to look so happy.

Everything felt like it was stuck to something else. Hair plastered to face, clothing stuck on skin, butt stuck to the saddle, sandals stuck to feet. It was hard to tell if the stickiness was due to rain or sweat. And it wasn't even really raining that heavily okay! Cos rain in Germany is that lousy, cannot measure up to Malaysian rain. Kesian those motorcyclists in Malaysia!

The best thing is when we finally arrived our friend opened the door and asked: "Oh, is it raining outside?" Reallrrwwwyyyyy????!!!

Then we went in, dried off, and sat down to lunch. Which brings me to The Thing I Like #4: Rhabarber. Rhabarber looks like this.

Sort of like celery, but pink. Since I came to Germany I've eaten rhabarber only a few times but they were all so good! First encounter looked kinda like this: 

Rhabarber cake baked my our neighbour's grandmother.

The sour taste went really well with the sweetness of the cake and the meringue top! 

The dessert my friend made today was rhabarber plus strawberries with cream and sugar. Sooooogooooood. I'm totally going to try making that at least once before rhabarber and strawberry season is over. 

...

In my last post I wrote about going to a dermatologist to get my moles looked at and hoped she wouldn't ask me to strip. Well, guess what? She did. She made me strip down to my underwear :'( and then when she asked me if I had any moles under those and I didn't know, she asked me to show her anyway. AND THEN she went and found a mole between my ass cheeks! ^$&%@*#@! What a humiliating experience. 

Only good thing is it seems my moles are fine, there's only one big one she wants me to get removed so the operation is in October. 

...

Funny short video to end a post!

Things I dislike #3

The ending of chuck. I know shows are meant to have a twist, but it's just sad. Recently I rewatched the whole five seasons and (everyone should have watched it right? no spoilers possible?) its just sad that sarah lost her memories.. even though they end up together.. still.. memories are everything to a person. :/




Seth

Traurige Stimmung in Freiburg

Soooo, Germany lost against Italy. The poor footballers were so disappointed la. I watched the game in Burger King with friends and when we left the streets were packed with stinky drunk people, only the drunkenness was probably more due to sadness and not celebration. When we got home our neighbours were sighing loudly out on their terrace. We went out and talked for a while with them. They were seriously SO disappointed! Is this what it's like to be patriotic? O.o Luckily I wasn't supporting any team in particular so I just thought it was a good game. Buffon is SO good! My handsome Egyptian receptionist in Milan is probably out celebrating right now :P

Got an appointment with the dermatologist tomorrow to get my many moles checked out. I hope I won't have to strip, that would be really embarrassing. Luckily the doctor's a woman.

...

This post is kinda boring, isn't it? I wanted to post about some stuff, like the first time I went swimming in a ladies-only pool or uni stuff but then I realized I already told everyone about the pool and uni stuff is hard to describe when you're not in a music uni... So yup.

And it's 1:58AM now. Hard to think.

Btw, a friend thinks that if when you check the time you see numbers like 3:33 or 15:15 or 12:12 or 88:88 it means someone is thinking of you.

Maybe I'll wait till 2:02AM, look at the clock, then go to sleep.

Durians

Durians! Yummy!

I've just finished writing an essay about progression to wholeness in fairy tales....

It got me thinking...

What if we're like durians?

Some think we stink.. some love us.

There are those who think durians smell like a stinky unclean toilet.. but there are others who love it! I guess for everyone of us, some people would think we aren't the best but there are those who we call friends who would love us. So no matter what negative stuff someone said about you today, there are others who would love you too! haha

Seth

Things I dislike #2

The new advertisements on youtube.

It's not the advertisement itself, but it delays me from watching my video!! 

Haiz.. but youtube has to earn money too i guess. :/

PS: hazel.. i didnt know it was a competition. =.=

Seth

Things I like #3

Bobby McFerrin!!!! He is so awesome!! Proof is here:

That one is for developing a happy mood right after waking up.
And here's one for just before going to sleep.

Ahhhhh~~~

P.S. Seth you'll never catch up! :P

Things I dislike #1

Just to keep things even, and because sometimes I smile even though deep in my heart I'm cursing, I'll post some of the things I dislike here.

I DISLIKE motorcyclists. Motorcycles are like mosquitoes. They're annoying when you're on the road. They would appear out of nowhere, zooming in and out at your sides, some of them extremely noisy and of course, they're always unwanted.

HAHAHA.

Nostalgia

When I read Hazelnut's post on her best friend, it made me rethink about high school and the people in it. There were people who I did not like, people who I did, however, after high school, everyone whom I met in high school were friendly. Seriously friendly. We just clicked. Somehow we got past our differences and we became sort of friends.

Some of the people who I weren't close to in high school are now my best friends. Three of them I keep in touch constantly, messaging each other without fail everyday.

Yeah, we weren't the closest in high school, but now you three know my schedule inside out. Anything that happens, I'll come and bitch to you three. And when one of you, the one with the crazy relationship, constantly breaking up and getting back together, and when u fight with ur gf, u would always come and bitch about it with us. Somehow sharing all these things in our lives got us closer. Although you are all the way in sabah, we still talk and its fun.

Another of you, an accountant, began work way ahead of us. When we started university, you were already working for an auditing firm, but that didn't stop you from keeping in touch with us. I guess it really depends on oneself when it comes to keeping in touch with others.

Finally the last one. I have to say I'm unsure about you. You would only come and find us when u are in need to talk. The most messages i received from you was during ur exam asking me to come over but right after, there was nth from you. Do you even know you do that? It seems kind pointless to connect with you.

One thing's for sure, whenever im in need of someone to talk to, one of u will always be around.

Seth

Things I like #2

Staying up reeeeeaaaaally late at night just for the feeling of solitariness. The peaceful kind. Then start wondering about the meaning of life...

(What I don't like so much: waking up around 5am with neck aching from sleeping in the chair and then 8am with eye bags.)

To the old best friend,

because tonight is one of those nights. 

I wonder how you're doing now? It's been so long since we really spoke. Used to be hours in school, texts after, occasional long random phone calls at night. 

I remember how heartbroken I was when I was assigned to another class after only a year, but maybe you didn't know, cos I was the "super calm no drama" person. Or maybe you did, cos you're awesome like that. Or maybe I whined a lot. Actually I don't remember anymore. Only know I was heartbroken. LOL. 

Because you made all the boring classes and tuition almost bearable! Remember when I stuck cellophane tape to your arm to see what would happen? :P

I miss you!!!

I used to think we understood each other really well. That one time we played truth or dare I couldn't even think of anything to ask you cos I shallow- and thick-facedly thought I knew everything about you. You said then that YOU were shallow because there's nothing deeper to you but that is so not true. Sadly I was the shallow one. But at that time I really thought I did know quite much.. and took pride in it, like a needy, faithful sidekick. Haha! 

Weird, our friendship was probably lopsided because you are awesome in ways I never will be and my awesomeness level will never measure up to yours. 

Still it was a good one. It wasn't the "you flatter me, I flatter you" kind, but we talked about everything, joked (your sense of humour, awesome^9999!), you knew all the contents of my pulsing black cobwebbed ventricles and atria, and you always gave really good advice! After a disastrous karaoke session you even burned a CD full of karaoke-worthy songs for me :')

It was easy to be honest with you cos you never judged me in any way. If anything, you made my crappy failures seem almost normal, human. 

I can even tell you I miss you without feeling queasy. :D

You know I don't think much of the label "best friend" but that is what you were to me. Even though you're a guy and I know my parents don't approve. :P 

I wonder though, are there such things as "ex-best friends"? We went our separate ways so long ago that about all I can recognize about you now is your face, voice and handwriting. Oh and the insulting "your mom" jokes =.= 

It's entirely my fault for not keeping in touch. You know, lazy habit of not replying mails, texts, returning calls. I didn't even reply your Christmas message!!!!! I'm such an ass. A really sorry one at the moment. 

Hope you're okay at home atm. Talk soon and see you soon!!!!! ETA of a hand-delivered postcard 11th August. xx

Things I like #1

New segment!


Because I sometimes fall too much into my everyday routine that I have difficulty separating things I just do and things I like. This is a self-reminder. :)


Things I like #1:
Being able to steal short periods of time away from obligations and people and life, preferably to a large secluded field, lie on the grass, feel the soft breeze and sun on my face. Doze... let my mind wander. 


Ahh the simple pleasures :)

Cheapia is the awesomest Cheapia.

Meet Cheapia, my schatzi of at least three years. 

Just now when I was in her room we had a "see who's awesomer" moment:

There is only one of me on Facebook!

Cheapia: *cries* "Yerrrrr I'm not awesome..."

And behold, I won the awesome contest! 


:D


Ok. I am actually aware that the above mentioned contest is actually not awesome at all, but because I am so awesomely kind I want you to be able to sleep well tonight without being bathed in sweat (geddit geddit?) I will show you something really awesomely awe-inspiring!


Meet David Belle. 

He is the founder of Parkour, awesome physical discipline and sport which focuses on efficient movement through obstacles by vaulting, rolling, running, climbing and jumping. Its received so much attention and is apparently so awesome that military forces started incorporating it into their training. 


You can watch the awesomeness of it here:

The ugly duckling

For selectives, i had to enrole into a class, the story behind fairytales. Today the story i had to do was the ugly duckling. A story i think most people would know.

In the beginning, the ugly duckling was shunned by his mum, siblings and friends. No one accepted him and its true, during our childhood, we would have no concept of our self. Who we are, are what our parents and friends tell us. "wow you're a smart kid" or "hey you're a naughty boy!" We wouldnt be able to think "are we really so bad? or naughty? or just a boy who reads and does nothing else?"

Then the ugly duckling had enough, he left and went in search for a place he belonged. If we truly want a change in ourselves, or know who we truly are, we need to take a step towards the path of discovering oneself. We need to make a move forward.

During the journey, a woman caught him and forced him to lay eggs, he was shunned by other animals. Even though people might label us or try to give us identities, it wont work because its not us. Only we could tell who we truly are.

The ugly duckling then hid in a creek and stayed there alone. During our journey to discovering ourselves, sometimes we need to take a step back from other people and muse ourselves. Without anyone to tell us, we need to be alone and think and ponder about life and how we have and would live it.

During the winter, he was freezing and a farmer found him and took pity and took care of him. Even though its a journey of searching for oneself, sometimes or rather some people would say, we, perhaps would have no meaning unless it is spent and used interacting with one other. We would need help on our way to discovering ourselves.

Finally he came out after the winter, noticing he's different and found out he's a swan with other swans asking him where has he been all this while. When we achieve finding who we truly are, truly finding out the truth, we would be without doubt i believe. :D Hopefully, everyone could achieve this.. "self actualization" and be happy. :)

Seth

Hazelnut

Well in the spirit of narcissism and what not, I realized this blog's other contributor did not put a pretty picture of herself! so here...



Seth

Ending of my second year medical school.

(image from http://questgarden.com/81/75/5/090504074616/process.htm)

That was how i felt like during my first two years of medical school. Little kids playing with stethoscopes.
 (no kidding)
The human body is so complicated. Even though there's only a limited amount of organs in your body but they are all connected and its just so amazing..

(how i passed my medical school exams)

Medical school seriously involves a lot of reading, I've always put reading as my hobby in questionnaires and what not but i truly didn't learn the meaning of reading until i entered medical school. Books, notes, websites, or anything with words related to medicine. In each system that you learn, there's a life lesson in it too.. sort of...

In renal system ( your kidneys) - u learn that you would always need a backup system, and definitely clear away whatever thats bringing you down. Never let it stay with you long and hold on to it if its spoiling you. Throw it away. 

In respiratory system ( your lungs and breathing ) - take everyday day by day, there's no point rushing and its definitely bad procrastinating. Like how its always good to breath nice and easy, not breathing too fast and hyperventilating or breathing slowly and then deprived yourself of oxygen, enjoy every breath, enjoy everyday of your life. But enjoy it every day. Dont tell yourself you would enjoy today tomorrow. LOL

Those are just something i could think of right now. The correlation is really small and its like im making this up, which i am, but what the hell. I write what i wan here. :P

Seth

An Introduction

It's funny, I think blogging is a seriously narcissistic activity. You write about the happenings in your life, believing it's so important, so interesting, that everyone must want to know all about it. Yet here I am, writing my first post on a group blog.


Blogger reminds me that this is not the first time I've done this. First there was "Endless Ruminations" which I deleted a few years ago, fearing I had poured out too much of myself on the internet. Then came "Rojaklah" which was meant to be a way for old friends to keep in touch but died a few months into its existence. (Sounds sad but we still talk sometimes even without the blog so it's okay.) "Hazel's Quatsch Cafe" appeared September 2011, was given the honour of one single blog post, and then promptly forgotten. 


So why GnD now?? 


About a week ago the blogging mood hit me again so I texted Nick asking him to invite me back to RojakLah. I intended to revive it. He said he would, so I settled down and waited for the invitation. Then coincidentally the subject of a group blog came up yesterday in a group chat on Whatsapp. Tsung Wai was thinking of starting one and wondering who to do it with. 


So tada! Birth of GnD. 


I think it's going to have a good life. Tsung Wai (Seth?) mentioned below he'll be contributing about med school and other interesting stuff. From me probably music uni (only if anyone is interested) plus happenings, hopefully more pictures than words, maybe some uninteresting things I want to say but no one wants to hear, maybe a few odd questions that sometimes swirl around in my head like in Dumbledore's Pensieve. Nothing too serious, nothing fancy, nothing too personal, to save it from suffering the same fate as "Endless Ruminations". 


Daumen drücken!!


Photos of the authors below, all taken off Facebook.

Leng zai on prom day. 

And another one! So you can see another side of him.

Last one to show his face.

And this is me.

Hope he doesn't kill me. 

Tata!

The very beginning. :D

Well this is the start of this blog. Haha. I think its better to start explaining some stuffs.. Like whats with the narcissitic blog domain. Truthfully... we couldnt come up with another. there were so many names that we came up with that at the end.. we just went wth.. and chosed this one inside. Its good right? Easy to remember ma. :D

Both of us have been authors in blogs that died off and its just sad.. so hopefully this blog wont die. and it would "live on". Not sure about Hazel, but Im gonna be posting stuff about my med school.. and other fun stuff worth mentioning. Hehe.

So if u see this.. memorize this address! and continue reading i guess.. Hahaha :P

Seth